Others too…

At dinner last night with a few old high school friends (I use “old” very loosely here!), discussion filled with separations, divorce, and pregnancies. One friend separated when I did, but has since officially divorced. Last week she prepared dinner for her ex-husband and her boyfriend who sat with her two boys at the table. What a gift!! There are so many beautiful, amazing lessons that sat in abundance. Christmas was spent with her ex-in-law’s and her family AT her ex-husband’s house. She said it was wonderful.

There is something to be said about finding AND delivering peace during a time when one would think peace is not anywhere to be found. Her actions are modes of paying it forward.   Means in which possibilities, positive possibilities, can open up…and spread.

And this is one I hope does spread….like wild fire.



I came across a relatively short explanation of what happiness is to me. I wrote this at the suggestion of a friend during the beginning stages of my separation. It was a way for me to stay focused…on what mattered. Reading it again I find myself feeling a renewed sense of confidence. Surely Happiness is contagious. My wish is that my boys have “caught” happiness and spread it everywhere they go. Below is an excerpt:

Happiness I have learned can be quite relative.  One can be happy that their first attempt at baking a cheesecake was successful, that they completed a life time goal of running a marathon, that their son and/or daughter hit their first home run, that they were able to save enough money to buy their dream home, or that their loved one beat cancer. Happiness can be relative to one’s own perspective and place in life at any given time. Certainly, happiness can also be experienced in degrees.  But once experienced, there is no doubting what in fact it is.  Simple, basic, pure happiness is however non negotiable in definition. It’s a smile that shines not only on one’s face but radiates outward so other’s not only see but feel one’s happiness.  And as a result, happiness spreads…..much like wildfire or the idea of paying it forward.  It’s a contentment with oneself as a person.  A confidence that exudes not conceit but a notion that exclaims to others “yes, you too can achieve.” It’s being present in each moment and relishing in the day to day schedule. It’s being strong in one’s own skin and not taking for granted they are affecting the people they pass along the way.  But capitalizing on this to evoke positive change.