Time

Once upon a time I dreamt of my wedding day, of my children, of my house. I dreamt of happiness, of love, of memorable moments, of traditions. I kept a list of children’s names I especially liked, names I would potentially give to my future children. These were my daydreams during my childhood. It was all about my future at that time. All about my family that I would create with a man that I would choose as my forever. My goal in High School was to graduate college, get married, and have children. I achieved this goal almost exactly as I had planned. Except it did not play out as I had imagined. Time is so precious. I don’t want to lose any more. And yet I know time is what I need to get to where I need to go. Positively the best advice I received over the past couple of years was “Take it slow.” Ironically, sometimes I notice myself so caught up in wanting to remain in the present moment that I completely lose the wonder of the present moment – all by focusing on focusing on remaining present. Does that make sense? I will say this – I am stronger. I am. Without a doubt. I am clearer. My thoughts are clearer. I have set backs, days of feeling foggy, even days of feeling weak, sometimes broken.
It’s all part of me. All part of moving forward. Time will tell.

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